Are you still Becoming?

Still Becoming: Why It’s Not Too Late to Build Confidence (And How to Start Today)

Somewhere along the way, many women over 50 were handed the message—spoken or unspoken—that our prime had a deadline. That growth, boldness, and confidence were things reserved for the young. But here’s the truth: we are still becoming. And your confidence? It’s not lost—it’s just waiting to be reclaimed.

If you’re a woman of color over 50, chances are you’ve overcome more than a few storms. But confidence doesn’t always ride in on the back of experience. Sometimes, we need to consciously rebuild it—with intention and compassion.

Here’s how to start today.

1. Name What You’ve Already Survived

Confidence blooms from evidence. And you, my sister, have receipts. Write them down. From raising families and building careers to healing from heartbreak or loss—you’ve done the hard things. Remind yourself of your resilience. Let your past victories be the foundation of your future strength. Journal and celebrate all of it.

2. Stop Waiting for Perfection

Confidence doesn’t come from having it all figured out—it comes from doing it anyway. Trying new things, speaking up, setting boundaries... these are confidence-builders, not confidence requirements. Your courage to act in spite of the fear is what will shape your new radiant story.

3. Let Your Style Speak First

Confidence isn’t just a mindset—it can start with something as tangible as your outfit. Wear the color you love. Rock the bold earrings. Put on the lip gloss. Not for approval, but just because you deserve to feel radiant. Sometimes, confidence shows up after the outfit does. Girl, I know you have an outfit to rock!

4. Talk to Yourself Like Your Girlfriend

You’d never talk to a friend the way that inner critic talks to you. So check her. First of all, name that inner critic. Mine? Her name is Judge Judy—need I say more? When she starts yapping in my head, I don’t argue. I just say, “JJ, take a seat. We not having it today.” Naming and taming that voice can be the boldest form of self-care.

5. Take One Small, Brave Step

Confidence is built in action. You don’t need to climb the mountain today—just take one step. Sign up for the class. Make the phone call. Speak up in the meeting. The win isn’t in the outcome—it’s in the decision to show up and move forward.

The Takeaway

Confidence isn’t a switch—it’s a practice. It’s not about being loud or extroverted. It’s about standing in your truth and honoring the woman you’re still becoming. And the best part? You’re not behind. You’re right on time.

What’s one brave thing you’ve done lately—or something you want to try? Share it in the comments so we can cheer you on.